LOTR...New Roles For LOTR Actors
Some Obsessions Are Less Harmful Than Others....My Precious
Now that ROTK is wrapping
up post production work, we want to make sure that the original nine don't
do anything...well, stupid, regarding their future career choices. Recall
that Angelina Jolie actually made not one but two Tomb Raider movies after
she nabbed an Oscar for her riveting work on Girl, Interrupted so we are
not being paranoid here. Therefore, we have assembled a list of career
suggestions for the actors who all starred in the LOTR Trilogy.
Just to be safe.
Sir Ian McKellen : Normally, we don't worry about Sir Ian, he continues to make excellent, if not artistically interesting career moves. However, we would love to see him do something really gritty, such as a movie on the life and times of F. Scott Fitzgerald.
John Ryes-Davies: A most underrated actor if there ever was one, Ryes-Davies should absolutely do more contemporary character roles. Hands down, our vote is for him to play Professor Moody in the upcoming Harry Potter Movie Installments Four and Five (and beyond depending on what the next two books yield). Only Ryes-Davis could pull off a role like that. And go and read the books if you don't know what we are talking about. If not, just ask your kids, they can tell you he's perfect for the role.
Viggo Mortensen: Aside from the fact that the actor would make a luscious Dracula (been there, bit that), he would do will to consider doing something smaller and more artistic to elevate him out of hunk status and into the Serious Actor category. A life and times of Monet perhaps? Director's perk: Nobody is going to have to teach him how to hold a paint brush.
Sean Bean: Tisk, tisk, keep your clothes on for awhile. We were thinking something very...English. And cheeky. A remake of Sherlock Holmes, The Early Years perhaps?
Orlando Bloom: If ever any one was destined to be a Heart Throb, it is Bloom. Before we suggest anything too Serious and Artistic, we think he should ride this teen angst gravy train for all it's worth. After all, the guy is only 26, there is plenty of time for introspection, rehab and a come back via People Magazine. A remake (non-musical, please) of Camelot with Bloom as Lancelot will do nicely.
Elijah Wood: Goodness knows he could use a break from obsessive compulsive and troubled youth roles. We vote for Risky Business II, the underwear scene is strictly optional however.
Sean Astin: In order to elevate him out of the side kick business, Astin is really going to have to go out on a limb career wise. There is no logic to this suggestion, only that we think he can do it: A bio of somebody really Brilliant yet Troubled. We vote for Robert Downey Junior though there is no physical resemblance. This will only add to the Pre-Oscar buzz of course.
Dominic Monaghan: The only actor in the bunch that we would like to see branch out and do theatre or more accurately, Broadway. He could replace Matthew Broderick on The Producers or take on a leading role in Grease.
Billy Boyd: Some writer seriously needs to create an original signature role for this actor. A youngish, bumbling inspector Clouseau type would be perfectly memorable.
Not part of the original nine but he was so brilliant, we cannot help but make one career suggestion for Andy Serkis who played Gollum with such riveting paranoia and wounded compulsion: Move over Hugh Grant, this funny, funky actor deserves a leading man's role. Nobody deserves to be chasing the likes of Julia Roberts around her in underpants the way Serkis does.
We have a feeling that he wouldn't disagree.
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