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They Doth Protested Too Much, I Fear

The recent war protests seemed like deja-vu for this TLL.Net staffer. I was in high school and college during the Vietnam War and I swear these
protesters were the same people who were protesting when I was in college. OK, at least some of them were. Most of my generation grew up, got jobs, and either became YUPPIES or DINKS. We were raising families, taking care of elderly parents, wondering what happened to our 401Ks, and trying to figure out how we were going to retire in a depressed economy. We were not necessarily pro or anti war.

The protests, though a fast fading memory with the press, accomplished one thing and one thing only. It gave those people that truly believed that they stopped the Vietnam War with their protests, Another Cause. The Vietnam War lasted 16 years by the way, so oh yes, those protestations really made a difference. These people have been sitting around Berkeley, San Francisco, and Santa Cruz for the last 28 years waiting for something really big to protest again. The men still have their ponytails and the women are still making beaded earrings with tiny piece symbols dangling from them. They have been taking extension courses in philosophy and metaphysics for years. They are the people living borderline lives on the streets or who have liberal trust funds and are therefore living in million dollar homes.

But they just can't give up the cause.

These middle-aged protesters were just tickled pink, because they figured they would get to teach a new generation how to protest. I couldn't believe my ears when I heard that they had blocked all of the exits to Sproul Hall on the Berkeley campus. "Folks, get a life", I wanted to say, "it has been done before." What was the point? CNN, FOX, ABC, CBS, were all telecasting the bombing in excruciating detail. Duh! Bush and his cabinet of cowboys were definitely not going to fold on this. However, the protesters were still stopping students from getting an education and preventing people from getting to their jobs in San Francisco. My favorite irony in all of this was that most of the San Francisco protestors were not San Francisco residents. One was actually interviewed and said that although she did not live in San Francisco and the protesting was costing San Francisco $100,000 a day, she felt justified because "the war was costing much more per day."

Now who can fight this convoluted logic?

I think my favorite protesters were the ones that had moved to the burbs and constituted the bulk of weekend soccer mom protesters. A fellow TLL.Net staffer and myself were taking BART to SF and happened to be on the train with some of these folks. They had the same slogans from the seventies: ("Give peace a chance" "War is Not Healthy for Children and Other Living Things.") Their picket signs were being held up by plant stakes (yes, there was still dirt on the pointy end) and their conversations were far from peace focused.

(Conversation overheard between Protester 1 (P1) with moody teenager listening to CD player and
Protester 2 (P2).

P1: "If we get there by noon, we can probably march down to the Civic Center by 3 p.m. and be back on BART by 3:30."

P2: "That would be good because I have to get ready for work tomorrow and do my nails. Jack and the boys have a Boy Scout meeting tonight and I promised them I'd make macaroni and cheese for dinner. I made a jello mold last night."

P1: "I know, I have just been so busy. I am sure glad that the protest is this weekend. I am scheduled to sell Girl Scout cookies in front of Safeway next weekend with Susie's troop."

P2: "Still this is important and I promised Barbara, I mean Moon Soleil that we'd be there. She has always been so dedicated to the cause."

P1: "Well, maybe by coming late like this, we won't have to stand in too many crowds."

P2: "I just remembered, I think this march takes us by a Mrs. Fields; I could use a cookie."

Just remember, the folks that had all the control weren't listening just like back during the Vietnam war. Somehow though, I feel the Yuppie moms will still be ready and on the alert. They will pick up those plant stakes and be ready to protest at a moment's notice.

As long as there is a Mrs. Fields cookie shop nearby of course.

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Asylum
Demi and Ashton

I don't mean to keep making fun of the Hollywood set, but they just keep doing things that make it so easy. Take Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher for instance. She is 40 something and he's just 25. Just think, Demi was in labor with the now 14-year-old Rumor when this kid was playing pee wee football in the 6th grade. He was a freshman in high school worrying about being a virgin forever when she delivered the now 11-year-old Scout. And yup, he was getting his driver's license when little 9-year-old Tallulah was born. Now normally, I might say go for it, but this kid was described by his 70's show costar in People magazine as a "little Iowa boy,". At least until he started hanging out with P. Diddy. Apparently, he believes he is now part of the new gen rat pack. Wow!

Demi and Ashton are turning up everywhere. Kissing and groping in public where ever they are. They have been seen at several Hollywood functions. They have gone to visit the kids and Bruce in Idaho, driving off to her lake house for privacy. I bet one thing for sure. I bet Ashton has a great deal in common with Demi's kids. He can probably play Back Street Boy songs with his armpit.