We finally had The Scottish Geisha right where we wanted her. Unbelievable luck led somebody to start searching the origins of surnames. It was of no surprise that MVP's last name had solidly reliable Slavic origins and that The Scottish Geisha's last name, or the origins thereof, suggested 'good' in there somewhere.
"I don't think they were referring to my character," she remarked seductively at the news.
Then somebody decided to look up the origin/meaning of Surly's last name, Scott Hannan, number 22, defenseman for the Sharks. We thought it might be fun.
Little did we guess how much fun.
Initially we had been hoping that Hannan might be Scottish in origin, a notion that might alarm or even amuse The Scottish Geisha. Either way, we would have been thrilled.
Turns out Hannan, actually spelled Hannah, is British by origin.
"Quit bothering me you heathens," The Scottish Geisha said, as close to testy as she gets on a very stressful day.
"And stop poking fun at Surly," she warned. "He's just started the new hockey season and doesn't need all this stress from you yaboos."
Never having to confront a real breathing, living, admittedly sturdy and hugely bigger than all of us, Scott Hannan gave us insanely foolish confidence.
We are so not afraid of Surly, we informed The Scottish Geisha in defiant tones.
The Scottish Geisha smiled and paused, in the mist of screaming phones and frantic deadlines, to consider.
"Really," she said, using the same even tone one might choose in dealing with a small, rebellious child. "That's lovely, really. You all just keep telling yourselves that then."
Then we found the meaning of Hannan, old English meaning, and all hell broke loose.
We tripped over each other to brandish our findings in front of The Scottish Geisha.
At first she didn't react. The news was just that astounding. Then, slowly, she composed herself and drew in a sharp breath.
"Give me the url of the web site that is claiming this is the original meaning of the surname Hannan," she demanded.
We waited while she calmly keyed in the url and then the information to research the surname Hannan.
"Oh my," she said. "Oh my my, oh my, oh my."
We were delirious with glee.
"So, which one of you Philistines is going to tell Surly the true meaning of his name?" she demanded.
Dead silence.
We all really, suddenly wanted to well, you know, live.
After all, who wants to tell a strapping young professional hockey player that his last name actually means: Island Full of Wild Cocks?