The Continuing Adventures of The Scottish Geisha
Chapter 25, Installment 22: The Thighs Have It
The Most Valued Pal (MVP) has kept annoyingly close tabs on TLL team since that little fib we told about The Scottish Geisha’s whereabouts. The Scottish Geisha never watched us that closely in fact, she always does her best to keep us at arm’s length. MVP, however, is much more adept at keeping us in line.
“Did you call back ALL the men and tell them that The Scottish Geisha really isn’t with some 25 year old blond hockey player in Vegas?”” she demanded.
Unfortunately, we had. Nobody, we are sad to report, thought our little story very funny. The heart surgeon was most especially put out. He actually said something about carving his initials into each and every one of our chest cavities and hung up.
Some people are just so touchy.
The only suitor we are truly concerned about is Bosco, the professional wrestler that worships The Scottish Geisha from afar. As her self appointed protector, we get more than nervous when he occasionally lumbers into the offices of TheLastLaugh and gently asks The Scottish Geisha if anyone is making her….unhappy.
Bosco is a very hefty six feet seven. His size and girth make even buff and tough Surly look like a well, a hobbit.
Upon reflection, we decided to make amends before The Scottish Geisha returned and Bosco made ready to check on her happiness.
“I don’t’ care what The Scottish Geisha says about Surly’s thighs,” MVP lectured. “That was no reason to imply that she was off corrupting him. She is so going to tell Bosco about this, you guys just wait.”
There was nothing for it but to start pursing the yellow pages for deals in long-term physical rehab. We just had a feeling that if Bosco found out about this, we all might need some serious physical rehab after all the broken bones healed.
“Surly is a prince compared to Bosco,” MVP seemed to enjoy reminding us at every turn. “You guys have no idea what Bosco will do to you all if he finds out.”
That settled it. The only solution was to find a way to have The Scottish Geisha hook up with Surly so our claims would then be the truth. After all, she was terribly fond of his…stick already. And we really did hear her confide in the MVP that she thought Surly had the thighs of a God.
“So WHAT?” MVP demanded. “All that means is that she maintains the highest possible standards for…uh, you know, thighs. She would never contemplate corrupting Surly. She is very protective of him. Very.”
We got the message. “And stop talking about Surly’s thighs,” MVP warned. “I am having enough trouble concentrating already."
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