---

Scottish Geisha Blog:

November 15, 2005:

"The Nashville predators are awfully....tiny for predators," noted The Scottish Geisha in a moment of dry humor.

It was true, several of the Predators topped out the scales at a mere five foot eight or nine, appearing as downright miniscule next to such big men as the Sharks' defenseman Kyle McLaren.

"Surly is having another good season," The Scottish Geisha noted happily. "What a nice young man, to help out the new goalie," she added.

Apparently a freak blade flip flopped the puck into the Shark's net when helped rookie Nolan Schaffer moved behind the net to turn aside the puck.

"That dear boy would have beat himself up horribly if Surly hadn't come to his rescue," The Scottish Geisha recounted of the Sharks vs. Predators game that ended in an OT win for the Sharks.

Surly, it seems, at least according to The Scottish Geisha, has become 'such a grown up boy'. Helping out new players and offering advice and support seems to have put Scott Hannan (aka, Surly) into a whole new category of admiration for The Scottish Geisha. "You people are to leave Surly alone," she admonished and not for the last time. "He is under tremendous pressure with his new role as grown up team. Now he has to help out all the rookies and new players while still playing at his usual high level."

The Scottish Geisha's continued and growing admiration and defense of (where did he get so darn lucky) Hannan continued to mystify those who called the offices of TTL their work home.

The Scottish Geisha's beloved daughter, The Little Princess (TLP) noted that rookie Nolan Schaffer was understandably twitchy.

"Just like Jazzy, VIP's beloved Welshie," she observed, mimicking his quirky side-to-side, head-to-head, body motions: Squirrel-Squirrel-Puck-Puck (head-head-shoulder-shoulder-twitch-twitch).

Hence the brand new word: Squirrelpuck which apparently only Welsh Springer Spaniel pups and certain NHL hockey goalies respond to or understand.

"I think" The Scottish Geisha said, "That you have started a new trend."

Squirrels of the world, beware.

Oh and pucks should watch out too.

August 28, 2005:

"How can you," she intoned. "Just sit there when all has fallen to ruin?"

And she wasn't referring to the City of Gondor either.

Seems VIP had called with an emergency. Jazzy, beloved puppy Welsh Springer Spaniel, had been having a bad time of it.

"All she wants to do is tree imaginary squirrels," lamented the Scottish Geisha. "That and indulge in....Spaniel drama."

Ah yes, Spaniel drama. It had taken us some time to understand that phrase, 'Spaniel drama'.

"This is clearly something only parents of Spaniels can understand," The Scottish Geisha said loftily.

It was true. The Scottish Geisha spent endless effort with VIP disecting the latest...incident.

"I just don't know what happened," she sighed. "One moment she was frolicking on the bed, as darling as ever. The next? Having a melt down of Spaniel proportions."

Turns out the pup got upset because her father, VIP's husband took off to run an errand.

"Normally, Jaay adores her little play dates," The Scottish Geisha related. "But she had such a bout of puppy separation anxiety that we just didn't know how to calm her down."

VIP had other ideas. "My dog is one giant spoiled baby," she said. "She wants her way and she's a Velcro dog, period."

The Scottish Geisha sighed and shook out her magnificant reddish mane.

"Be that as it may, Jazzy is obviously going through a...delicate emotional period. She needs more attention and some finessing to manage her moods. She's still just a baby."

VIP raised her eyebrows and frowned, a neat trick in itself. "Yes, that's it. That's precisely WHY little Miss Precious gets her way. She knows how to use her adorableness to manipulate those around her."

"Oh, I don't think she's being that way on purpose. Remember, my daughter has a cat. Now Baby Thuddwhacker, now he is manipulative. Jazzy is simply...sensitive and needs a lot of attention."

VIP wasn't fooled by this. "I want to hear you say that at four in the morning when the adorable, precious and yes sensitive baby that she is decides she needs to play," VIP remarked drily.

The Scottish Geisha shook her head, "Was there ever more Spaniel drama than this?" she wondered.

We didn't disagree.

---------------------------------------

Chapter 823, Installment 1829: Life Without Hockey

The Scottish Geisha was in a constant state of distress.
"There is no life," The Scottish Geisha declared for the millionth time. "Without hockey."
We decided not to comment because any response from us seemed to make the situation worse.
"And dear, dear Surly," she went on to say, to no one in particular. "A young man with all that....energy. Surely he is missing his profession, such a fine physical outlet at that."
 Knowing that Surly was more than capable of four dates in one night, we declined again to comment.
The NHL hockey lock out was wearing thin on everyone. And hockey season had not even officially started.
"This legal mess must simply be over and done with by Nov. 17th," The Scottish Geisha stated dramatically.
November 17th?
The look we received in return could have curdled fresh cream.
"November 17th, you buffoons, is the date the Sharks are scheduled to play against the Detroit Red Wings," The Scottish Geisha replied coldly.
Ah yes. Shanahan. The Scottish Geisha's most detested player in the NHL. We had hoped to stage a bit of fun during that game, in her honor, of course, but the prank we had planned was looking less and less likely.
"You people need to leave me alone in my grief," The Scottish Geisha said solemnly."After all, how much shopping do you think I can do at this point?"
The Scottish Geisha was making sense. She had pretty much bled her platinum card dry and still, no hockey.
At this point, we could only wait and hope for an early resolution.

---------------------------

Chapter 510, Installment 1957: Say Mama

The Scottish Geisha was bemused that the MVP, a speech therapist by trade, was trying to teach her Welsh Springer Spaniel to say "Mama".
"If anybody can do it," The Scottish Geisha remarked at the news, "She can."
We were skeptical at best. The dog was adorable, no doubt about that, but saying Mama?"
The Scottish Geisah narrowed her eyes in warning. "You people haven't a clue. Jazzy is very smart, very talented. She can do anything she sets her puppy mind to."
We had no doubt that were the task to revolve around squirrel bating, that Jazzy would have in nailed in no time.
"You all just wait and see," The Scottish Geisha said mildly. "Jazzy is very smart. I wouldn't be surprised if she manages this small task in no time at all."
We decided to take a wait and see approach.